March 3, 2018
So I called Jared in for a frank talk. “Jared, you’re going to have to go to prison,” I said.
“But, Daddy . . .”
“Shut up and let me finish, you stupid weasel. You’re also going to have to die in prison.”
“To get the prosecutors out of my ass. And because you’re even more corrupt than me.”
“Unlikely, yes, but looking possible. Anyway, I’ve got to give them a big scalp and it looks like it’s your turn in the barrel.”
“I hate barrels, Daddy.”
“On your way out, tell Don Jr. to come in. I told him he’s allowed to attend the prison of his choice. Gonna have to give Mueller a lot of scalps.
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Andrew Feinberg is the author of Four Score and Seven, a novel that imagines Abe Lincoln comes back to life for two weeks during the 2016 campaign and encounters a candidate who, some say, resembles Donald Trump. It is available on Amazon. He is the author or co-author of five non-fiction books. His political journalism and humor have appeared in the New York Times, the Wall Street Journal, Playboy, GQ, Barron's and Kiplinger's Personal Finance.
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