June 15, 2017
So Mike Pence came by the Oval this morning and said, “I’m a Christian, a conservative and a Republican—in that order. Call me Mr. President.”
Then he started humming “Hail to the Chief.”
I’m seriously considering replacing Pence with Sarah Palin, the impeachment condom.
But I’m going to try something else first. Time to terminate Robert Mueller with extreme prejudice, as they say. And then—and this is so great—I’m going to make sure the government withholds his last paychecks. That’s right, I’m going to stiff the stiff.
Always remember this: Super Baby DonDon is a Christian, a lunatic and a douchebag—not necessarily in that order.