April 6, 2016

So Steve Bannon got kicked off the principals committee of the National Security Council. How you like that, President Bannon?

Super Baby DonDon will now toss you the inside poop on what really happened. First, we needed more room on the principals committee to make way for Jared Kushner, Jared Kushner and Jared Kushner.

But I was also angry at fatfart Bannon. Things aren’t going well at the White House and that can’t be my fault so it must be his. This pisses off Super Baby DonDon bigtime. I have a huge bucket list of destruction and desecration and few items are getting done.

Then there’s the issue of name-calling. Steve-Ho used to call me Mr. Trump, just as Jared Kushner and my close friends do. Then he moved on to Baby DonDon. After I won, it was Super Baby DonDon. Then he went to Supey.

“You mean like Soupy Sales?” I said.

“If the soup fits.”

It does not fit. After the largest inauguration in the history of the galaxy, I asked him to call me Mr. President and he said, “Sure, Supey.”

NO!!! NO!!! I threw my Big Mac right in his fat face.

With me it’s all about dignity, always dignity. Steve-Ho couldn’t treat me with the dignity I so richly deserve. So I drilled him a new one.

This is leadership.

The following two tabs change content below.
Andrew Feinberg is the author of Four Score and Seven, a novel that imagines Abe Lincoln comes back to life for two weeks during the 2016 campaign and encounters a candidate who, some say, resembles Donald Trump. It is available on Amazon. He is the author or co-author of five non-fiction books. His political journalism and humor have appeared in the New York Times, the Wall Street Journal, Playboy, GQ, Barron's and Kiplinger's Personal Finance.

Latest posts by Andrew Feinberg (see all)