May 20, 2017
So in her usual POS New York Times column, Gail “Dog Face” Collins mentions today that I once said Belgium was “a beautiful city.” Well, it should be a city, Dog Face. And I’ll suggest a downgrade when I’m there next week wowing the Brussels sprouts.
So here I am in freakin’ Riyadh, where it’s 167 degrees. I just caused a minor international incident by ordering bacon for breakfast. They didn’t bring me any. “Stupid camel jockeys,” I said.
I turned to Jared for help, but, well, that didn’t work either. “But, Jared, you’re the guy who is porking the lovely Ivanka.”
The camel fondlers seated at our table shook their heads. “You can’t say ‘porking’ here, Mr. President,” said a man name Falafel.
Oh, political correctness, like Gail Collins, is such a bitch.