August 9, 2017
Yeah, you’re smiling now, lardass.
Was I presidential yesterday or what? Fire and fury, baby, fire and fury! Me, fire and fury–my favorite threesome.
Next, I am going to rage-tweet Kim Jong-un into submission. I will call him apocalyptically ugly and say he has a face like a nuclear blast site. I mean, the man-boy has hair that is an embarrassment to every North Korean. And North Koreans do not embarrass easily.
I will call him a Nancy boy and say that we will aim our bombs at his testicles. Speaking of which, I have ordered our military to paint my face on all of our nukes.
Talk about an upgrade!