Gettin’ Presidential Over Betsy DeVos

February 2, 2017

Okay, it’s time for Super Baby DonDon to act freakin’ presidential and try to rally support for my deplorable education secretary nominee, Betsy DeVos. Two Republican turncoat senator bimbos have already come out against her and if there is another Republican defection she will be toast.

Here goes: This is a woman who never got a break in life. Despite being enormously wealthy, her parents refused to buy her enormous breasts. Having so much from the get-go was not easy. I know how hard it is to be a rich man’s son. It messed up my personality bigly.

But Betsy DeVos has always been dedicated to education, a feeling that was reinforced by her academic success at the College of Dressage and Secretariat University. Senators, I know some of you have been startled by her encyclopedic lack of knowledge about education. But an incompetent system demands an incompetent leader, and it’s hard to imagine an education secretary who knows less about public education than Betsy DeVos. The fact that she didn’t bother to study for her confirmation hearing is another argument in her favor.

And if you don’t believe me, consider what Rick Perry had to say: “Betsy DeVos may be almost as smart as I am.”

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Andrew Feinberg is the author of Four Score and Seven, a novel that imagines Abe Lincoln comes back to life for two weeks during the 2016 campaign and encounters a candidate who, some say, resembles Donald Trump. It is available on Amazon. He is the author or co-author of five non-fiction books. His political journalism and humor have appeared in the New York Times, the Wall Street Journal, Playboy, GQ, Barron's and Kiplinger's Personal Finance.

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