April 27, 2017
Oh, did I unveil a great tax plan or what?
All my kids called me to offer congrats—Ivanka, Don Jr., Eric, Barron and the other one. I was very moved. Oh, yeah, Tiffany.
And they should be happy because just by eliminating the estate tax they’ll have an extra $4 billion to divvy up. Huevas dinero! That’s a lot of money to split four ways. Er, five ways.
I told my people that every single clause in the tax plan has to benefit me or my family. That’s tax simplification, people! How else explain the deduction for senior men with luscious daughters? And the fact that all breast augmentation surgery is triple deductible and that’s retroactive. Fantastic!
And, because I’m an old softy, I tossed in a big tax deduction for people with tattoos of Richard Nixon on their backs. Hey, Roger Stone, this tax break is for you!