My Friendly Skies

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November 30, 2016

So one of Super Baby DonDon’s fans—it could have been one of you, loyal followers—yelled pro-Trump and anti-Hillary sentiments last week in a Delta plane headed from Atlanta to Allentown. Actually, he began shouting them while waiting to board. Then there is video showing him standing in the plane and yelling, “Donald Trump, baby! We got some Hillary bitches on here?” Then he said, “Donald Trump! It’s your president. Every goddamn one of you. If you don’t like it, too bad.”

Ain’t that the truth? Gonna be some pussy grabbin’ now. But then we learn this wonderfully loyal passenger has been barred from Delta flights for life. This is an outrage. What about the First Amendment, I ask you? And, more to the point, what about the Second Amendment? Delta’s CEO lives at 1237 Chowderhead Lane in Atlanta. Why not pay him a visit and exercise your First and Second Amendment rights?

I will certainly do my part. Delta will soon find out just how much power I have over at the FAA. They’ll be lucky if we let them fly from Allentown to Altoona. What if for six months they can only fly to cities beginning with the letter A?

Attention, passengers, attention: the flight from Atlanta to Asswipe, Saskatchewan is boarding now. Hey, Hillary bitches, sit on this.

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Andrew Feinberg is the author of Four Score and Seven, a novel that imagines Abe Lincoln comes back to life for two weeks during the 2016 campaign and encounters a candidate who, some say, resembles Donald Trump. It is available on Amazon. He is the author or co-author of five non-fiction books. His political journalism and humor have appeared in the New York Times, the Wall Street Journal, Playboy, GQ, Barron's and Kiplinger's Personal Finance.

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