Making Change

December 29, 2016

Brace yourself, fellow citizens. To symbolize how big a change Super Baby DonDon will make to the nation, today I’m introducing the images that will grace U.S. currency starting January 21. In ascending order, you will see the new image for the $1 bill (sorry, George), the $5 bill (bye, Abe), the $10 bill (Alexander, you need more than a hit show to keep your spot), the $20 bill (Andy Jackson, you were toast anyway) and the $100 bill (no need to keep calling this a Benjamin).

So what should you do with the old currency you’ll no longer need? Mail it to:

President Donald J. Trump

The White House

1600 Pennsylvania Ave.

Washington, DC 20500

The money you send in will be applied to tuition payments at Trump University.

 

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Andrew Feinberg is the author of Four Score and Seven, a novel that imagines Abe Lincoln comes back to life for two weeks during the 2016 campaign and encounters a candidate who, some say, resembles Donald Trump. It is available on Amazon. He is the author or co-author of five non-fiction books. His political journalism and humor have appeared in the New York Times, the Wall Street Journal, Playboy, GQ, Barron's and Kiplinger's Personal Finance.

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