Dead Man Walking

 June 15, 2017

So Mike Pence came by the Oval this morning and said, “I’m a Christian, a conservative and a Republican—in that order. Call me Mr. President.”

Then he started humming “Hail to the Chief.”

I’m seriously considering replacing Pence with Sarah Palin, the impeachment condom.

But I’m going to try something else first. Time to terminate Robert Mueller with extreme prejudice, as they say. And then—and this is so great—I’m going to make sure the government withholds his last paychecks. That’s right, I’m going to stiff the stiff.

Always remember this: Super Baby DonDon is a Christian, a lunatic and a douchebag—not necessarily in that order.

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Andrew Feinberg is the author of Four Score and Seven, a novel that imagines Abe Lincoln comes back to life for two weeks during the 2016 campaign and encounters a candidate who, some say, resembles Donald Trump. It is available on Amazon. He is the author or co-author of five non-fiction books. His political journalism and humor have appeared in the New York Times, the Wall Street Journal, Playboy, GQ, Barron's and Kiplinger's Personal Finance.

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